How do you guys dump lung disease into a box and keep it from taking over? How do you guys cope with the mental stress of chronic illness?
I think I’ve gone through denial, anger, acceptance, frustration then repeated the cycle like many times.
I’m pretty sure I know what this is. I’ve had twitchy lungs since I was little. I always got chest colds after every cold as a kid. I remember my parents talking with the doctors about putting me in the hospital as a kid for bad bronchitis but I was too afraid to sleep in a strange bed. I always dreaded spring running in the school field because my nose would pour out mucus afterwards then the coughing fits would start, I remember growing up with the eczema patches on in the folds of my arms and around my knees. I remember having getting good at picking out the strength of the steroid creams depending on where the rash was on my body. I remember the first time I experienced cold induced asthma, when I stopped running, was gasping and made a high pitched whistle that even I was surprised could come from a human body. I remember my first skin test and watching large welts grow from little pin pricks to giant circles then they morphed into spiders. I remember being offered immunotherapy 9 years ago and chickening out.
I’m 99.99% sure this latest insane breathing trouble is my old friend asthma and atopy. But the mind does funny games … maybe the doctors can’t control my symptoms because it’s reflux, or vocal cord dysfunction, or a problem with floppy airways or ABPA. All I know right now is steroids suck (this right now is all that’s really working) and it stinks that I’m still in limbo and scared and tired of being sick. It’s exhausting.